1. TRANSCENDENTAL ARGUMENT
(1) God exists.
(2) If God exists, then if reason exists then God exists.
(3) Reason exists.
(4) Therefore, God exists.
2. COSMOLOGICAL ARGUMENT
(1) If I say something must have a cause, it has a cause.
(2) I say the universe must have a cause.
(3) Therefore, the universe has a cause.
(4) Therefore, God exists.
3. ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (I)
(1) I define God to be X.
(2) Since I can conceive of X, X must exist.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
4. ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (II)
(1) God exists.
(2) Since God exists, God must be perfect.
(3) That which is perfect must exist.
(4) Therefore, God exists.
5. MODAL ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT
(1) God exists.
(2) God, existing, is either necessary or unnecessary.
(3) God is not unnecessary, therefore God must be necessary.
(4) Therefore, God exists.
6. TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT
(1) Check out that tree. Isn't it pretty?
(2) Therefore, God exists.
7. ARGUMENT FROM MIRACLES
(1) My aunt Helen was most likely to die from cancer.
(2) She didn't.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
8. MORAL ARGUMENT
(1) In my younger days I was a cursing, drinking, smoking, gambling, child-molesting, thieving, murdering, bed-wetting bastard.
(2) That all changed once I became religious.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
9. ARGUMENT FROM CREATION
(1) If evolution is false, then creationism is true, and therefore God exists.
(2) Evolution can't be true, since I lack the mental capacity to understand it; moreover, to accept its truth would cause me to be uncomfortable
(3) Therefore, God exists.
10. ARGUMENT FROM INTELLIGENCE
(1) Look, there's really no point in me trying to explain the whole thing to you stupid atheists -- it's too complicated for you to understand. God exists whether you like it or not.
(2) Therefore, God exists.
11. ARGUMENT FROM INTIMIDATION
(1) See this bonfire?
(2) Therefore, God exists.
12. DORE'S ARGUMENT
(1) I forgot to take my meds.
(2) Therefore, I AM CHRIST!!
(3) Therefore, God exists.
13. ARGUMENT FROM GUITAR MASTERY
(1) Eric Clapton is God.
(2) Therefore, God exists.
14. ARGUMENT FROM AMERICAN EVANGELISM
(1) Telling people that God exists makes me filthy rich.
(2) Therefore, God exists.
15. ARGUMENT FROM BLINDNESS
(1) God is love.
(2) Love is blind.
(3) Ray Charles is blind.
(4) Therefore, Ray Charles is God.
(5) Therefore, God exists.
16. ARGUMENT FROM SMUGNESS
(1) God exists.
(2) I don't give a crap whether you believe it or not; I have better things to do than to try to convince you morons.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
17. CALVINISTIC ARGUMENT
(1) If God exists, then he will let me watch you be tortured forever.
(2) I rather like that idea.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
18. ARGUMENT FROM UPPERCASE ASSERTION
(1) GOD EXISTS! GET USED TO IT!
(2) Therefore, God exists.
19. ARGUMENT FROM HIDDEN LOGIC (II)
(1) Atheists say that God doesn't exist.
(2) But they only say that because they want to look cool and
intellectual in front of their peers.
(3) They don't fool me!
(4) Therefore, God exists.
20. PEACOCK'S ARGUMENT FROM LIMITED VOCABULARY
1) You use lots of big words.
2) Therefore, I cannot possibly be expected to understand your refutation of my position.
3) Therefore, God exists.
21. ARGUMENT FROM DIVINE ECONOMICS
1) Protestant Christian nations are rich.
2) Therefore, God exists.
22 .ARGUMENT FROM TEEN/TWENTYISH CHRISTIAN MOVEMENT
1) God is so totally awesome, dude, and if you would pretend that Creed and POD were good bands, you would realize that.
2) Also, our Youth Group leader Skip once, like, cured a broken leg using only the power of the almighty Lord.
3) Therefore, God exists.
23. ARGUMENT FROM DESIGN
1) If there is a designer, then God must exist.
2) If I find a watch in a forest, there must be a designer
3) *throws watch into forest*
4) Therefore, God exists.
24. ARGUMENT FROM FUTURITY
1) I will prove the existence of God in the following argument.
2) Therefore, God exists.
25. ARGUMENT FROM PREFERRED ANCESTRY
1) I don't want to be related to monkeys.
2) Therefore, God exists.
26. ARGUMENT FROM PERSECUTION (II) / ARGUMENT FROM IDIOCY (I)
1) Jesus said that people would make fun of Christians.
2) I am an idiot.
3) People often point that out.
4) Therefore, God exists.
27. ARGUMENT FROM BIGOTRY (FRED PHELPS'S ARGUMENT)
1) The Bible says that anal sex is yucky.
2) I agree.
3) Plus, some gay people died of AIDS.
4) Therefore, God exists.
